well, with the design of your dash, i think you need the kit they make to make it look half decent. i dont think aftermarket DIN hu's will fit, but i am not sure, dont quote me on it. i will see if i cant look up where this kit is manufactured.
for hu's...its all about money, and look. you can find something with great features, but i am sure it needs to meet some standards. personally, I dont like flashy high techy look, but some do. either Nakamichi, Clarion Proaudio, Pioneer Premier, Eclipse, or higher end Alpine will work....but for sound quality purposes, the units with 24 bit dac's, and 4volt or better preouts for the amps in a must. i have a clarion proaudio, and its a lilttle flashy for me, but not bad by any means, it fits in well with the scheme of the car, and the color of the screen is adjustable to your likes, and one option almost perfectly matches BMW's audburn/orange backlight dash color.